Youth Group Therapy: The Theological, Psychological, and Spiritual Impact of Youth Ministry (and Why it Should Matter to the Local Church)

Elijah* was a 16-year-old student in our youth group when we first sat down for lunch at a local burger joint near our church. He discussed his family, friends, and how things were going at school. The conversation quickly changed into something deeper and more spiritual as Elijah began to reveal how he had been struggling with depression and thoughts of suicide. This was the first time he had told anyone about this. As I sat there practicing basic empathy skills as best I could with him, I was beginning to panic and feel unequipped for this level of conversation. How am I, a youth pastor, supposed to help with his struggles in mental health? Am I even supposed to?

Elijah is just one of many teenagers I have encountered in youth ministry who have shared their mental health concerns with me. The reality is, if you work in youth ministry, it is only a matter of time before you find yourself working with teenagers who want to talk with you about these types of issues. And they will want to know what Jesus has do with it, if anything.

The teen mental health crisis is unavoidable for youth workers and has been getting a lot of attention in the media. A staggering report from the Centers for Disease Control reported a large decline in mental health for teenagers in the U.S. In 2023, 4 out of 10 teenagers reported experiencing persistent feelings of sadness and hopelessness; 2 out of 10 considered death by suicide; 1 out of 10 attempted suicide. Female and LGBTQ+ students were more likely to experience these symptoms.

What does the teen mental health crisis have to do with youth ministry? One word: belonging.

Youth desire a place where they belong, and research has shown that regular church attendance is a protective factor for teenagers’ self-esteem. A recent Barna survey suggested that the top three expectations of a youth program are that it provides a safe space for students to explore their faith, have positive peer relationships, and a place they can bring their friends. Students want to be a part of something. At our youth group we have a wall that every new student gets to sign their name on. It’s an implicit message for students to know that this is a place made for them. Their name belongs here.

Belonging within a Christian framework involves both belonging to Jesus and belonging to Jesus’ community. There is a dyadic relationship within belonging which entails experiencing being known and knowing. Consider Jesus’ teaching in John 10:14-15, “I am the good shepherd: I know my sheep and my sheep know me—just as the Father knows me and I know the Father.” A teenager who understands belonging from a biblical perspective can place their identity in Whom they belong to and experience freedom from shame.

Jesus’ work doesn’t just bind us to him, it binds us to his community. The book of Acts records this very thing happening in the early church, “All the believers were one in heart and mind. No one claimed that any of their possessions was their own, but they shared everything they had” (Acts 4:32). The early church was one in heart and mind. Belonging to Jesus’ community is a place of diversity where we can be known by others and know them.

“Jesus’ work doesn’t just bind us to him, it binds us to his community. ”

A sense of belonging in the universe is innately human. Psychologists suggest that everything we do is done in an attempt to connect with others. It’s all about attachment. John Bowlby developed a theory that suggested there are four styles of attachment that occur during the early first years of childhood: secure, anxious, avoidant, or disorganized. These attachment styles are learned through early experiences and impact how we form relationships with others, such as friendships and intimacy. These attachment styles can be unlearned or relearned through new experiences in community. A positive, genuine community is able to help teenagers form healthy attachment and new ways of belonging.

Why should a youth ministry care about attachment theory? Isn’t it just a mental health thing? A secure attachment style is suggested to aid in one’s ability to view their relationship to God in a positive way. Experiencing healthy relationships that they can trust and depend on enables a person to see God as a being who is gracious and trustworthy.

Both theology and psychology suggest that people need to experience genuine belonging in relationships to be spiritually and mentally healthy. I believe youth group is that very place where integration can happen. I believe youth ministry offers the unique setting for students to experience belonging, the very thing shown to increase mental health. And the very thing Jesus offers.

In addition to providing students with referrals to mental health services, what is a youth pastor to do when it comes to the mental health crisis? Show students they belong.

Elijah is okay by the way. Looking years back at that first conversation we had, I asked him how / if the youth ministry helped. He said, “it connected me to community.” In other words, he felt like he belonged.

*I changed the student’s name to Elijah. He gave me permission to use his story and is 18 years of age.